I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
