My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize