do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
