white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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