how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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