sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Randomize
