Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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