Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
