you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Randomize
