We won't sleep together?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
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