I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
