How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
