just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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