You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
