Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
