Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize
