big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
This house was built for laser tag.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
