he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
so let's talk penis.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
