OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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