Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
