i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize