Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
