We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
