i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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