just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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