I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
