Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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