ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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