yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Randomize
