Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Randomize