i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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