she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
