i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
