YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
