I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Randomize
