Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
