The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
