i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
did i walk over a car last night?
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
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