He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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