You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
