The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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