dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
