so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
this is an emotional support booty call
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
