Kiss
Puke
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
