I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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