I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
operation have a gay friend backfired
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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