Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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