Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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