i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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