well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize