It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
